Take Courage

Cowardly lion in The Wizard of Oz (Click here for video)

Courage: "the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery."

From the very beginning of this journey with disseminated malignant melanoma, I have asserted that the loving God in whom I put my trust has our highest good as His aim. He has firmly established this certainty through the sacrifice of His Son, offering us an overcoming, transformed life that will last for eternity.

While we live on a fallen and rebellious planet, however, we will face difficulties, reversals, challenges and tragedies. In the midst of our struggles, He graciously provides strength and opportunities to grow in character and in intimacy with Him. I am convinced that these circumstances are a demonstration of the wise and irresistible love of a holy God -- He cares more about my character than my comfort or career; He values purity of heart over prosperity; and offers greater rewards in longsuffering than longevity.

One of the areas of character that He has been patiently working on recently is that of personal courage. Although I have already survived far beyond any reasonable expectations, there is evidence that the cancer is advancing. I have recently experienced bouts of rather severe pain presumably due to new or growing metastases of the brain and skeleton.

With the help of Hospice Care we are, of course, adjusting pain meds (and the meds to combat the side effects of those meds). Yet I find myself surprised by what I deem a deficiency of courage and endurance when the pain is severe. Although I have sat at the bedside of many a patient going through terrible suffering, there is nothing like personal experience. I am still learning...

As I study examples of courage in scripture, here is what I observe: Courage is a character trait that, when appropriate, the Lord commands. For example, when given a specific mission, the warrior Joshua is told: "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go." (Joshua 1:9) Or as He speaks to Daniel: "O man of high esteem, do not be afraid. Peace be with you; take courage and be courageous!" (Daniel 10:19) This implies to me that, in the face of adversity, courage is a choice I can make... and it is up to me to make that choice. It also made possible because God is with me in the midst of the challenge.

I also notice that, unlike some other character traits identified in scripture as evidence of the transformative power of faith (see the fruit of the Spirit in Galations 5:22-23), courage is more active determination than it is my surrender to a supernatural enabling. I must take courage. Of course, in the face of adversity a loving God makes His resources known with promises such as "Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)

I conclude that courage is a choice and a learned response, only evident in the face of threat or actual adversity. It is enabled by an ongoing intimate relationship with the One who, because of His great love for me, Himself endured incomparable suffering on a cross (Hebrews 12:2), overcoming death itself to ensure my eternal destiny: "He will swallow up death for all time, And the Lord GOD will wipe tears away from all faces" (Isaiah 25:8)

In spite of persistent and numerous metastastes in both brain and elsewhere I am truly grateful that I still have the capacity and opportunity to gain eternal benefits from the experience. Not to be compared with the difficulties faced each day by the brave men and women serving in active duty military, or the public servants who repeatedly risk their lives to protect or rescue those in need, this ongoing battle with advancing cancer is yet teaching me what it means to take courage. Thank you so much for your many expressions of love and support while on this journey.

May we all have the nerve to trust Him more,
Dr Dan

PS -- Thank you Lord for the new heart you gave me when I first trusted in you. Now I could also use a new (tumor-free) brain! (Or, like Dorothy, get to go home :-)